You may be thinking, they never want to go anywhere! That’s not entirely true, we introverts like to see new sights and enjoy fun entertainment … we just like them during slow seasons when other people aren’t crowding our space. If you’re traveling with a ‘less than excited’ introvert – I have some tips that will give you some relational brownie points and get you both excited about vacation!
As an introverted wife, married to a extraverted husband – there are times when our ideas of vacation differ drastically. From beaches to mountains, and to a crowded cruise line (that one inspired a panic attack) … our ideas of vacation have differed over the years. As means to find some enjoyment with each other on vacation – I have a few tips for you . . .
They will require some comforts of home –
At the end of a beach day or sight-seeing day – we introverts crave getting settled again. Our settling comforts from home help us unwind and feel grounded again. Things like our cozy blanket, fuzzy pajamas or essential oils – these small things give us pleasure! I’ll let you in on a little secret, this vacation – I’m taking my Keurig! It may sound silly however, while others are standing in the kitchen waiting to get their cup filled, I will be waking quietly in my room (brewed coffee in hand) avoiding the morning chitter-chatter. Allow your introvert to bring from home the items they feel most at home with. You’ll score bonus points if you mention that there is space in the travel compartments for their comforts – this shows them you care enough to notice what makes them happy.
Give them time to listen without the need to respond –
We love your stories … or rather … we love you! Therefore, we will patiently listen while you retell your work saga or recall a funny memory. Please don’t stop communicating to us or think your words aren’t important to us; however, there will be times when we need to not have to respond. When you see us reading or popping in earbuds – take this as a hint that we are recharging and enjoying the thoughts in our head. We introvert’s love to think, however the need to respond can be tiring if we haven’t had ample time with our own thoughts.
It’s not personal, we just need alone time –
Introverts tend to take in more than words – we also feel the emotions of those talking to us. As well as absorb the environment we’re in. For instance, if we’re in a crowded room with loud music, our nerves get stimulated generously. It’s like getting constant static shock – we need time to get away from the stimulus. If you’re traveling with kids, begin to instruct them about “quiet time” and recognize when it’s needed. When we see our needs being valued and respected – you’ll experience a happier and more willing traveling companion.
Give us time to small talk our way into conversation
The reason small talk is exhausting to an introvert is because we simply can’t think topically. Where extraverts can get recharged exchanging facts and pleasantries – we need to dive deep where undiscovered and unspoken thought is waiting to be discovered. It’s a neurological fact that our brain pathways are longer, needing more thoughtful stimuli. Whereas an extravert are shorter, needing smaller and quicker spurts of thought. We certainly enjoy bringing our brain to the conversation! We love to ask pondering questions. When you see your introvert doing this – engage them. Often times introverts feel alone because people simply do not engage their level of conversation.
The best part about traveling with an introvert is their ability to see and hear things you may have missed. They will pick up on subtle colors in the sunset and remember how you made them feel at the dinner table. They will embrace moments and recall their emotions at a later time. When you travel with an introvert they will add depth to the vacation … when you acknowledge and value their perspectives, you’ll gain their excitement and longing for future adventures together.
If you’re an introvert, drop a comment tip you’d love for your extraverted spouse or friend to know!
Happy travels!
